Take a walk in my shoes....

If you are a parent, friend, teacher, or relative of someone who has APD, chances are you have found my blog to find answers of what it is really like to have APD and how you can best help that person you care for. Well, I am going to not only tell you what its like, I am going to do my best in helping you see what its like. So, keep reading and take a journey in my shoes...

Clear your head and imagine you are sitting in a classroom. Pretend that you are sitting about midway in the class, not to the front but not too far towards the back either. Now imagine that there is a girl sitting next to you who is fiddling in her backpack, a girl behind you is talking to a neighbour about their plans for the weekend, a boy on the other side of you is chewing a piece of gum trying to make a bubble. Then you look up and try to block that out and look at the teacher however you notice her shoe is untied and that the air vent behind your teacher is making a weird noise, so to you the teachers instructions are starting to sound like the teacher on charlie brown, in other words, its not sinking in nor is it making any sense. By the time you mannage to focus the teacher has said "does everyone understand what they have to do"? and so you being completly lost and embaressed decide to say nothing and sit there not knowing what to do looking around the room at your classmates for clues as to what is to be done.

Pretty over whelming eh? Lets give you another example because let me tell you, its not just about the class room. Pretend you are in the hallway sitting around with a bunch of friends.One girl is talking about a movie she saw the night before and the other girls are raving to see it and are all contributing. Then out of the blue another girl starts talking about another movie, quite simular and you are still thinking about the first movie being spoken about so now that you have processed what you want to say you decide to contribute only for the other girls to begin to tease you and say things like "Your so slow" or "Geez bit of a blonde moment there". Can you imagine having to deal with this EVERY SINGLE DAY?

How about just a normal day at home. Your sitting down on the couch and talking to your mom and then she says " Honey, after you finish feeding the dog can you go upstairs and put the cloths away and then grab my green jacket on the right hand side of my closet so I can take you to school"? To a 'normal' person, those instructions are fine but if you have APD chances are your not going to remember half of those instructions or you will mix them up like instead of looking in the right side of the closet you will look to the left, and instead of getting the green jacket you get the blue one or you will go up stairs and go straight for the jacket completly forgetting about the clothing that needs to be put away. Even if the instructions are short, you have to be careful that you are completly clear on what you said and make sure that APD child has heard what you said. Once, my aunt sent me to get her key underneath her paint can outside her house to get something in her house and I spend 10 minutes looking for a PINK can before her calling me and telling me the difference.

Here is another question. Have you ever had the experience of listening to someone talk that has a different accent than you or has a lisp or even just talks a little faster? Do you remember the feeling of having to focus so hard on each word spoken trying to figure out what he or she is saying and becoming so frustrated and annoyed having to ask them to repeat things or to slow down? This is what it is like for somoene with APD EVERYDAY! On top of this, there is the struggle with school work, reading, and other struggles that come with the territory of having a learning disability.

So, in saying all this I would like to ask you, Why would one 'fake' having a LD when they it is such a struggle or why would one laugh and make fun of someone who has one? The truth is yeah, we are a little bit different than what most people would call "average" but really what is average? Aren't we all unique and all different in our own way? Yes some people, like myself require more things to help us with our challenges that make us different but that dosen't mean we aren't smart, independant, capable, loving, kind, and driven human beings.

Some of you may think...How can this girl have a learning disability when she can write a blog like this? Well, my answer to that would be having a LD dosen't mean we struggle with everything it means we have stuggles  with a few things but excell in other areas.  To be more specific, the Learning Disabilities Association of Canada defines it as "A number of disorders which may affect the acquisition, organization, retention, understanding or use of verbal and non verbal information. These disorders affect learning in individuals who otherwise have atleast average abilities essential for thinking and/or reasoning". For instance, take a look at Albert Eienstien a man who was so intellegent in the area of math and science and created formula's however he has dyslexia and struggled with reading. Also, there are people like Thomas Edison who created the light bulb, Tom Cruise the famous actor and Walt Disney the creator of Disney. For me, I struggle with comprehension, listening, short term memory, spelling just to name a few however I am talented with my music, I am also a good writer(despite grammer and spelling issues), I am very organized and most importantly am a very determined and hard working person and although I don't always get that A on a test, and may not always get the joke first thing, It dosen't mean I am stupid.

Now, after reading this, let me ask you. Why is it so hard for some family, friends, teachers or even parents to be understanding of a child with a LD. We understand you don't all have PHDs or all the knowledge in the world on not only auditory processing disorder, but any LD, however, we do hope that instead of putting us down saying we are no good and can't do anything or going the other way and saying we look fine and should stop being lazy, why can't you instead take the time to understand us and truly learn what we go through day after day and appreciate that even though we struggle, we are trying our best to succeed.

So, I would like to end this blog post by saying wouldn't it just be easier to accept our challenges and help us feel better about ourselves than to tear us down? Do you think by putting us down or ignoring it that things will get better? Just like any person who is struggling we need support and guidance. I have been quite fortunate and have met so many wonderful people through facebook groups(which I mention quite a bit) who have kids or they themselves are dealing with many of the same issues I am so its like I have a large extended and supportive family:) It is so great to have that support because often times we don't get it from the people we think are suppose to love us the most which can be so hurtful. I will leave you with this quote that says " Family isn't always blood. Its the people in your life who want you in their's; the ones who accept you for who you are. The ones who would do anything to see you smile and who love you no matter what". - Unknown


-apdteen23